Christ, when will he ever shut up?
Caption competition. The BNP's disastrous Red, White and Blue security-fest has provided us with a number of articles, some excitement and a lot of laughs over the past couple of weeks but the world is generally returning to normal and it's time for us to get back to reality and carry on doing our bit to get rid of this rubbishy party and its increasingly loathed leader. But let's leave with a laugh and find some decent captions for the picture above which shows Nick Griifin boring the troops and Alan Warner looking like he's wishing he'd never invited the BNP to within a hundred miles of his house.
Let's have your captions for the pic (normal rules apply - let's try not to be too obscene but we realise we may be asking too much there) and we might even be able to get a prize together for the winner. Go for it!
How much to get me to resign? Do I hear £20,000? £25,000? Yes, I hear £30,000. For thirty thousand pounds, I'll be going, going, gone.
ReplyDelete"Two fat ladies, 88. One and eight, 18..."
ReplyDeleteMuslims, blah-blah, Sharia, drone-drone, Holocaust, yawn-yawn, crimes against whites etc etc etc
ReplyDeleteSorry, I know it's not that funny but that's all he ever says.
The Red, White and Blue this year was attended by a record four million people, the protesters could only manage to get three reds to stand and shout at us. The people of Denby love us and want me to father all their children...
ReplyDeleteAnd so on.
"And I'm going to scotch the rumours right now. Mark Collett and I are just good friends, that's all. Yes, we hug - manly butch hugs - and yes, we admire each other, but we're not gay. Well, I'm not anyway."
ReplyDelete"Paedo Boy isn't like those nasty non-white Asian paedophiles I always rant and rave on about. He's a wholesome white paedo from a reassuringly Anglo Saxon Christian background. If I was a young girl I'd sleep with him myself".
ReplyDelete"And let me tell you, Lee Barnes is the most intelligent man I know..."
ReplyDelete"What makes me qualified to be the Prime Minister of this country? Um.........."
ReplyDelete"So there was this wo- ni- black bloke, right, and a pa- Muslim chap and a mi- pad- Irishman..."
ReplyDeleteWe will form the next government. All I need is more money.
ReplyDeleteOh Lord have mercy! The Fuhrer is guffing from both ends again.
ReplyDelete...and all we need is a chopper of truth. I know where I can get a superb second hand helicopter and it will only cost us...
ReplyDelete"There's a new begging letter being sent out. the Truth truck has had a puncture and we now need an additional £11,000."
ReplyDelete"I remember when Mark Collett was THIS tall and I used to sit him on my knee and give him a stiff talking-to."
ReplyDelete"And now it's Hymn No 12 from the Radio Times Popular Hymn Book..."
ReplyDelete"There was this midget..."
ReplyDelete"These rumours that I'm gay are all lies. If I was gay, I wouldn't be married to whatsername."
ReplyDelete"I keep explaining this. If we lose against the rebels in court, it will cost us thousands. On the other hand, if I win..."
ReplyDelete"Two fat ladies, 88. One and eight, 18..."
ReplyDeleteOh very subtle. I just noticed that.
Oh my god what are the idiots who run the PC BNP website going to make of this. The king has no clothes.
ReplyDeleteVery good question. I'd say the rising tide of immigration is about this high at the moment.
ReplyDelete"Don't be ridiculous, there's no one there."
ReplyDelete"My God, it works. I put my hand over my eyes and he really thinks he can't see me."
The Truth Truck is about...about this big.
ReplyDeleteAny other questions?
Matchbox I think.
Alan was mortified to realise that the invitation had called for brown shirts.
ReplyDeleteNick explained that running costs for the Tent of Truth would be surprisingly high.
ReplyDeleteAnd finally, we need one more person to volunteer for security.
ReplyDeleteYes, we were OK - but one of the volunteers had a shaven head, blue jeans and large muscles, and he accidentally gay-bashed himself.
And the winner of the Invisible Lottery is...oh, me again.
ReplyDeleteThats not Alan Warner sat down, it's Peter Mullins.
ReplyDelete'Thats not Alan Warner sat down, it's Peter Mullins.'
ReplyDeleteWarner, Mullins, who cares? In the interests of annoying the BNP it can be anyone we want.
Look, I know I'm a slobby fat lard arsed bastard, though that too is the fault of Johnny Foreigner! Especially those damn Chinese and their irresistible Beef Chow Mein's with deep fried crispy noodles.
ReplyDeleteEx member.
"Warner, Mullins, who cares? In the interests of annoying the BNP it can be anyone we want."
ReplyDeleteLOL Thats what I like to hear. Fuck the BNP!
"Remember the magic box we screwed three thousand quid out of you to buy? Well here it is..."
ReplyDelete(Actually, that's about as visible in the picture as it was at the RWB. Nobody even saw BNPTV there at all.)
And this year the Luke Smith trophy goes to Lancaster's very own violent thug Mr Chris Hill.
ReplyDeletePS
I think the Luke Smith trophy is awarded for the best punch thrown at the fasfeat.
'And this year the Luke Smith trophy goes to Lancaster's very own violent thug Mr Chris Hill.'
ReplyDeleteHill is a lot of things I detest but I doubt very much if he is a violent thug. Anyway, he wasn't at last year's RWB. As far as I know the only punch thrown last year was by Mark Collett at Andrew Spence. Then Collett ran away, the tart.
"We need a place to meet regularly where we won't be bothered by reds and other riff-raff. I have a barn we could use on my estate at Pant-Y-Girdl. I just need £50,000 to do it up and it'll be great...."
ReplyDelete"Pant-Y-Girdl"
ReplyDeleteLOL I'm a great lover of Welsh place names but I had to laugh at that!
Hill has admitted on his own blog that he was thrown out this year for causing trouble. What more evidence do you need than that. Face it to get thrown out of the fasfest for violent behaviour has to be bad, although I bet he thinks it gives him some street cred with the rest of his mates. Now a BNP ASBO would really get him some respect from the lad
ReplyDelete'Hill has admitted on his own blog that he was thrown out this year for causing trouble. What more evidence do you need than that.'
ReplyDeleteRather more than a pro-Griffin, anti-rebel creep can provide, thanks. I've got no time for fascists, least of all those who live in my own town, but Hill has stated clearly that the accusation was a lie, that he wasn't even at last year's RWB and that Shapcott's claim to the police was simply because he is persona non grata in the BNP now that he has gone over completely to the rebel's side and as we all know, the BNP will lie whenever it suits its purpose. None of you lot can be trusted but in this case, I'll choose to trust the word of someone who is anti-Griffin over someone who supports that fat, corrupt bastard any day. Provide a photo of Hill bopping someone and I'll print it along with an apology but somehow I don't think you'll be able to.
"Rather more than a pro-Griffin, anti-rebel creep can provide, thanks. I've got no time for fascists, least of all those who live in my own town, but Hill has stated clearly that the accusation was a lie, that he wasn't even at last year's RWB and that Shapcott's claim to the police was simply because he is persona non grata in the BNP now that he has gone over completely to the rebel's side and as we all know, the BNP will lie whenever it suits its purpose. None of you lot can be trusted but in this case, I'll choose to trust the word of someone who is anti-Griffin over someone who supports that fat, corrupt bastard any day. Provide a photo of Hill bopping someone and I'll print it along with an apology but somehow I don't think you'll be able to."
ReplyDeleteLOL Nice. :)
"I'll choose to trust the word of someone who is anti-Griffin over someone who supports that fat, corrupt bastard any day."
You forgot amoral, thieving, one-eyed, perverted, nazi and so on.
"Nick explained that running costs for the Tent of Truth would be surprisingly high."
ReplyDeleteLove it.
Some idiot on the BNP's website has posted a comment claiming that none of the Sex Pistols have ever taken drugs and that the BNP should be seen as the Sex Pistols of British Politics.
ReplyDeleteHow about a competition:
If the BNP was a band who would they be?
"And I will lead this party into oblivion...did I say oblivion? I meant to say government."
ReplyDelete"Some idiot on the BNP's website has posted a comment claiming that none of the Sex Pistols have ever taken drugs and that the BNP should be seen as the Sex Pistols of British Politics.
ReplyDeleteHow about a competition:
If the BNP was a band who would they be?"
10000 Maniacs?
No, the first £20,000 was just for the truck. This £20,000 is to modify it so it transforms into a robot...
ReplyDelete"I'll be happy when my money pile is this high"
ReplyDeleteAresless chaps... oh my God how disgusting!
ReplyDeleteAnonymous said
ReplyDeleteIf the BNP was a band who would they be?
Hang on, how the fuck can solo act be a band?
"Hang on, how the fuck can solo act be a band?"
ReplyDeleteEver seen the comic strip episode private enterprise where Peter Richardson nicks a bands demo tape?
How about
ReplyDelete"Shut the fuck up, and get awf moy land"
And now a quick chorus of the "Horst Wessel Lied"
ReplyDeleteSorry my German is so bad !
Old Sailor
Dire Straits - Money for nothing
ReplyDeleteThe BNP should be called the
ReplyDeleteSEXPISSEDTROLLS
"First, an apology. I really wanted the swastika backdrop, but Mark was set upon the ruched elephant's knicker look, sensitive soul. So in the interests of my reputation, I let him have it.... err... let him have his way..... err we settled on this white ruched curtain. Now, on to business........"
ReplyDeleteAnd as for our frozen accounts, I've completely solved the problem - I gave it all to a building society called Lancaster Unity...
ReplyDelete