BNP wants to hang criminals live on TV – secret television schedule discovered on Welsh pig farm

6.00. Early Morning Noose: Catch up on all the important overnight hangings.

7.00. Good Morning Bigots: Presented by popular comedy duo Dave and Mark. This morning: Book cooking for beginners. KKKrafters KKKorner: Mark shows how to design BNP election leaflets using pictures of Italians and Americans. Romantics Rendevouz: Dave and Mark show how easy it is to smuggle under-age girls into your hotel room. Also includes Lee’s Legal Advice Surgery: today “Ten f*cking reasons why the BNP isn’t racist despite what the fuzzy-wuzzies say.” Tomorrow: “Why the moon landings, 9/11 attacks, 1066 and Simon Darby’s blog were faked by The Jews. It’s really f*cking creepy, man.” Friday: “What to do when you when you find yourself incarcerated in a padded cell.”

9.00. The Andrew Marr Show: Hard-hitting journalist Andrew Marr gets to the bottom of why BNP President For Life Nick Griffin is such a nice guy. “We’ve heard the stories,” says Andrew, “but how true is it that Mr Griffin likes little puppy dogs and will go out of his way to help a distressed sheep? We investigate!” Includes film of Nick Griffin tickling the tummy of a puppy dog and going out of his way to help a distressed sheep after saving the life of a cute little bunny rabbit while on his way to visit an orphanage.

10.00. The Jeremy Piles Show: “I’m not in MI5,” says Simon, but Dick Barnbrook is suspicious and demands a DNA test. Tomorrow: “I’m not a paranoid schizophrenic,” says Lee. Friday: “I am a paranoid schizophrenic,” says Lee.

11.00. Farming Today: A Welsh pig farmer shows you how to survive the recession by running your very own political party. “It’s the best thing I ever did,” says wily Nick, trousering a wad of notes. “I just send a few emails and the money comes rolling in. Fantastic!”

12.00. Angler’s KKKorner: Find out which members of the Advisory Council are sleeping with the fishes.

12.45. Lunchtime Noose. Find out which members of the Advisory Council are next.

1.00. The AntiKKKes Roadshow: Dust off that old Nazi memorabilia and bring it along for a valuation. You’ll be surprised how much that old letter expelling you from the BNP is worth!

2.00. Women’s Hour. Presented by Lynne Mozar and Marlene Guest. Today Lynne explains the various uses of the word “Paki”, while Marlene goes to Dachau to explore the roots of modern cosmetic dentistry.

3.00. CBNPTV – including: The Billy Brit Show (replaces The Sooty Show); followed by Blue Peter: Aunty Val and Uncle John show you how to make your very own working concentration camp out of a Corn Flake packet and an empty margerine tub. You’ll need plenty of glue for this, children. Next week Val and John show you how to make your very own cattle trucks so that you can transport your very own prisoners to your very own concentration camp on your very own home-made Death Railway, so have your scissors and double-sided sticky tape ready.

4.00. Record Breakers: Today, members of the Young BNP break the late Lily Allen’s records.

5.00. Nooseround.

5.15. Strange Hill: School-based drama. Last week a shocked Nick and Simmo discovered that one of their teachers had a black girlfriend and asked new boy Bob Cottage for help. This week, as the school rebuilding project gets underway, Nick and Simmo discover that their English teacher is both gay and Jewish and seek advice from first-formers Dave Copeland and Tony Cucumber.

6.00. Evening Noose - public hangings from around Britiain.

6.30. Regional Noose - public hangings from places of interest in your area. Includes local weather forecast.

7.00. History Today: In this edition we visit some of Britain’s best known graveyards to find out who’s been history since the BNP took power.

7.30. KKKoronation Street: All is not well in the Racist’s Return as Nick suspects Christian of plotting against him (violence and language caution).

8.00. Wild Down Under: Absorbing documentary from Australia all about wildlife in Sydney’s Sutherland Shire. Watch the desperate efforts of the Hodges Dingbat as it attempts to stuff 500 nuts into its pouch. Also features rare footage of the endangered Hanson’s Bigot.

8.30. World In Faction: Current affairs programme on the political life of Nick Griffin. Part 45: “The National Front Years: Disaster strikes” - Patrick Harrington joins the National Front.

9.00. Build A New Life In The Sun: Ahmed doesn’t want to leave his comfortable Oldham home, but some men with shaven heads try to persuade him otherwise. Will Ahmed choose sunny Pakistan or a rope around the neck?

10.00. Noose at Ten

10.30. Noosenight: Tonight, Kirsty Wark and Jeremy Paxman get theirs. Includes interview with a Very Important Benefits Claimant and Fake Trade Union Leader, plus a review of tomorrow’s noosepapers.

11.00. Spooks: Episode 643, “Those demmed blecks”. Arthur’s cunning plan to infiltrate his ex-wife into the antifascist movement has been rumbled. An angry Bep tells Arthur he should have remembered that email headers give the game away. Caution: contains very strong Serth Efricen eccents (subtitled).

12.00 Epilogue – presented by his Holiness the Archbishop of Holbeach, the Reverend West. Tonight, “Why God says it’s okay to hate darkies” Tomorrow: “Why God says it’s okay to hang antifascist bastards”. Friday: “Why God says it’s okay to love Odin but not darkies or antifascist bastards.” Next week: “Why Odin says ‘There is no God but if there was he would say it’s okay to hate darkies and hang antifascist bastards (and the scum who never voted for me in Norwich North)’.”

1.00. BNPTV Noose 24 - overnight hangings live from Hampstead Heath. Includes Market Report from the Hong Kong Stock Exchange.

Norfolk Unity

Nelson school in row over BNP stunt

A still of the Lie Lorry from the YouTube video

A row has erupted after BNP members parked a campaign trailer outside a school.

Representatives, including two councillors, were filmed arguing with a senior teacher from Pendle Vale College, in Oxford Road, after a large sign emblazoned with the party’s logo and a slogan was driven to the site. Now the footage has been posted on YouTube, as well as the BNP’s website.

Coun Derek Dawson, who represents Gannow ward on Burnley Council, said he and Pendle borough councillor Brian Parker were in front of the school to do an interview for BNP TV about the Government’s £250million Building Schools for the Future programme. Schools across Burnley and Pendle have been merged and rebuilt as part of the flagship scheme.

Coun Dawson said a senior teacher, believed to be an assistant head, came out of the school to tell them to move. He added: “We were on the road outside the school and causing no trouble.”

Yesterday, Pendle Vale headteacher Steve Wilson said: “We have a duty of care to all of our pupils. With that in mind, we felt that having a BNP billboard parked outside our multicultural school may have had an impact on pupils as they were leaving, and we asked the occupants of the vehicle to move it, as we would have done with any similar vehicle displaying a political message.”

Lancashire Telegraph

BBC to take action over use of Edinburgh Military Tattoo footage on BNP site

The British National Party is illegally using BBC footage of the Edinburgh Military Tattoo to promote its agenda among young people.

BBC lawyers have announced that they will be writing to the party demanding the footage be taken off BNPtv, its online television channel. The film appears on the Youth BNP site, and shows several pipe bands marching at the Tattoo, including some that are not even British. A member of one of the bands that features in the film said he was angered that their identity had been commandeered to serve a political purpose.

Justifying their use of the copyrighted material, the BNP said it had "history" with the corporation, which famously sneaked hidden cameras into one of their meetings two years ago.

The Sunday Herald brought the issue to the attention of the Edinburgh Military Tattoo organisers, who then prompted the BBC to take action.

A spokesman from the Tattoo said, in a guarded statement: "The matter has, we understand, been referred to the BBC's intellectual property lawyers in London. Clearance has not been obtained from either the BBC or the Tattoo for the use of the footage in question and it looks like a possible breach of copyright."

But an insider at the Tattoo revealed that organisers were "appalled" by the use of the footage. He said: "We're not happy that this footage has appeared on their website. The Edinburgh Tattoo has no connection with the BNP and we have no wish to be associated with them."

The giveaway that the film was under copyright was the use of a Steadicam, a camera used only by professionals. The BBC recognised the footage as their own and passed the matter on to their intellectual property department, who will take further action next week.

A BBC spokesman said: "Due to the growth of the internet, it is very difficult for the BBC to police all use of its material online. The BNP's broadcast of the Military Tattoo is not licensed by the BBC and we are contacting them to request its immediate removal."

The Scottish Trades Union Congress pointed out that the BNP had "shot itself in the foot", as the Military Tattoo was an event that was attended by a cosmopolitan group of troops and spectators from many different countries.

Ian Tasker, assistant secretary of the STUC, said: "We would not be happy with the Military Tattoo being used to promote the narrow-minded agenda of the British National Party. The Edinburgh Military Tattoo, albeit a display of militarism, propagates the sort of cross-cultural message that the BNP absolutely detests. We wonder what the message they are trying to get across is."

The bands shown in the film include corps from Australia and New Zealand, who marched alongside military bands like the Black Watch as well as university groups. The Aberdeen University Officers' Training Corp was one of those bands and regimental sergeant-major Angus Steele said: "The BNP have hijacked our identity. It's quite concerning."

Simon Darby, spokesman for the BNP, argued that the British National Party had every right to use the footage. He called the BBC and Edinburgh Military Tattoo's reaction "totally pathetic" and said: "We're not going to get intimidated by the politically correct brigade just for having images up on BNPtv of a spectacular event and part of our culture that we're proud of. It is much ado about nothing because, remember, this is the BBC that tried to smuggle hidden cameras into our meetings and then tried to get us locked up for seven years. I notice they didn't ask for permission to film us."

Sunday Herald

BNP to set up HQ in North Wales

The far right British National Party is moving the headquarters of its merchandising arm (above) to a secret location in North Wales. Party leader Nick Griffin yesterday said it would be based in Deeside – but claimed he did not know where.

The commercial wing is called Excalibur and produces merchandise for the BNP including T shirts, mugs and key fobs.

Party treasurer John Walker flatly refused to specify where Excalibur would be based. Mr Walker said: “There is no need for us to say where this premises is.”

Yesterday politicians from other parties reacted with concern to hear that the BNP were setting up such a premises somewhere in Deeside. Alyn and Deeside MP Mark Tami said it was a development local people would want not want to see in the area.

“This is a very unwelcome development,” said Mr Tami. “Clearly there views are abhorrent to the vast majority of the British public. Nobody would want to see this in the area and I hope that people steer clear of buying any merchandising from the BNP.”

Shotton East councillor John Beard said: “I don’t know where it is but it is certainly the last thing that the people here would want. I would echo what Mr Tami has said that this is a most unwelcome development.”

Anti racism and fascism campaign group Searchlight claimed the secrecy showed the BNP’s true colours.

A Searchlight spokesman said: “If they were really a legitimate party why do they act so differently to other parties and why are they not saying where it is? It is exactly what we have come to expect of the BNP, they are not being open with their dealings.”

Video clips by BNPtv of the new base have been posted on websites including YouTube.

But an unrepentant Nick Griffin claimed the presence of the party’s commercial arm in Deeside would benefit the local economy.

“It is bringing a lot of money into the area and it is no-one else’s business where a legitimate party has its offices,” he said. Mr Griffin has claimed the party has undergone major changes in the last few years to improve its image and electoral appeal.

Daily Post