June 19, 2008

Boris, Barnbrook and the Prosopography of bananas

Boris Johnson was accused of turning the Mayoralty into an 'empty vessel' today, after delegating most of his powers to unelected advisors and deputies.

At an ill-tempered and repetitive session of Question Time, Labour, Liberal Democrat and Green members of the Assembly all questioned an increasingly frustrated Boris as he repeated his time-worn response that Londoners would care more about results than procedures

But as his questioners refused to be fobbed off, he lost all patience and accused them of being 'pompous' and obsessed with the 'prosopography' of his administration. And as if that language wasn't 'clear and unambiguous' enough, he went on to deny any comparison between himself and a 'potemkin figure' pitched to conceal the real source of power. No such comparison had been made.

However, with no translator or historian to hand, Assembly members were forced to ask their questions all over again.

And frustrated as he was with the assembly's apparent ignorance of medieval and Crimean military history and their relevance to London government, Boris switched instead to his ever-trusty stock of Latin proverbs, none of which seemed to do the trick.

Eric Wimp or Bananaman

But as both the assembly and the audience started to drift off, the BNP's Richard Barnbrook pulled out a banana and began to chomp away. But unlike Eric Wimp, this act of defiance did not appear to have any visible transformative effect.

In fact when a City Hall official politely asked him to put the fruit away, he rose not like Bananaman to battle, but sank Wimp-like into a pliant concession.

But when his turn finally came to ask his questions, London's favourite fascist didn't disappoint. Due to ask a question on 'black cab drivers' (he wants more white ones) Barnbrook instead decided to thank Boris for having 'taken race out of the Rise festival'.

The Chair Jeanette Arnold, who has become a figure of hatred on far right bulletin boards since Barnbrook's election, ruled the point out of order and the assembly moved on. But when Barnbrook got his second chance to speak, he completely lost his rag.

His question on crime rates and Afro-Caribbeans was initially more third rate than Third Reich as he attempted to frame it as being asked out of concern for his 'black constituents'.

But when Boris replied that 'Londoners will be thoroughly dismayed by this racist breakdown' Barnbrook suddenly turned red and began to shout and thump the table.

And as he continued to rage and ignore the ruling of the Chair, all pretence of him being a serious politician peeled away. And as the session slipped by, the audience were left with little more than the off-colour sight of the BNP's very own Mr. Bananaman.

Tory Troll

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

One does have to ask why Dicky chose the phallic symbol of a banana?????

When we are all very well that Dicky much prefers the rounder symbol of a pint glass......