December 18, 2008

From Welshpool with love...

Do you remember the ludicrous story the BNP tried to inflict on a weary public back in April 2006 in which Nick Griffin was alleged to have been the target of an assassination attempt? It doesn't really matter if you do or not because the story wasn't true, as we explained here. In the same article, we referred to another work of fantasy - the story that, in February 2007, Griffin had been attacked by a bunch of thugs on his way to a meeting but that his assailants were fought off by his heroic, if steroid-bound, bodyguard, Martin Reynolds. That one also never happened.

We referred to these flights of fantasy as a couple of the top-ten list of classic BNP lies and up until today I personally would have expected the fake assassination attempt to make the number one spot. Now though, we have a new contender...

Simon Bennett, supposedly some kind of computer whiz (though he seems to have made a real dogs dinner of the BNP site), has, it is alleged by the fantasists at BNP HQ, been approached by Special Branch, who not only asked him to provide them with information on what went on at branch level but also offered him £200 in used notes as an incentive.

According to the report on the BNP's website, Bennett had just returned from a 'business trip' to Northern Ireland when he was stopped and held by the police, the offer being apparently made at that point using the pretext that SB was keeping an eye out for potential extremists inside the party.

If this is the case, why on earth would Special Branch approach a known Griffin-loyalist who makes money out of the party (and apparently has his own business) to take him on as an informer and, a rather better question, why would they offer him an amount like £200 which, to the likes of Bennett, who can afford to gallivant to and fro across the Irish Sea, is a pittance?

Although highly improbable, the story isn't that bad so far - or at least until the BNP try being clever in the report and go just a little over the top.
Having told Nick Griffin and several other key officials about the approach, Mr Bennett was given the ‘OK’ to continue and to see how long it took them to get down to their real business. He met them several times over the following few weeks and, once again, they didn’t do anything other than say how much they agreed with large amounts of BNP policy.

When they called him to another meeting in a local pub, however, one of the two handed Mr. Bennett a menu. Inside were several photos of individuals and he was asked if he could identify any of them. He said that he couldn’t and gave the menu back, only to have a roll of twenty pound notes shoved into his hand...the SB men told Mr Bennet that they had prepared a safe house for him because he had to “be protected.” Mr Bennett was given the code name ‘Nicky Price’ and told to text in a message to the agents every night “to let them know he was safe.”

“The safe house story was obviously made up,” Mr Bennet said. “They said they were on their way back down from Windermere, which told me that they had gone up there to carry out surveillance on the premises where the meeting was to be held, and most likely to bug it with a listening device.”

(The meeting went ahead as planned, but the attendees, all warned in advance, were careful to ensure that they did not discuss anything indoors which they did not want the Special Branch to know.)

“That’s far enough for me. I’ve donated their bribe to the party, and am going public so they know that they have no hold on me. I think it’s disgusting that, at a time when they still haven’t caught the Islamic extremists who groomed and duped a Special Needs youngster into trying to bomb the Giraffe restaurant in Plymouth, the secret police are wasting time and taxpayers’ money trying to subvert the British National Party.”
Oh dear. A safe house? A menu with photo's tucked away inside? A fake name? All this on a pay-off worth a measly £200? I suppose we should only be grateful that the whole thing didn't take place on a bench in Kew Gardens. You know the kind of thing. Scene opens with man sitting at bench eating an ice cream, another man sits on bench putting newspaper down beside him, second man leaves a couple of minutes later without newspaper, ice cream man picks up newspaper and wanders off, inside newspaper are plans for secret Russian submarine base in Norway, world is saved from encroaching threat of Communism, play music, roll credits, fade out. Ian Fleming, eat your heart out.

So let's take a quick look at Simon Bennett. Is he the serious kind, who would risk all to play the role of James Bond within SPECTRE SMERSH the BNP? No, because he's a childish idiot. Look at this tosh. And it seems he runs three websites that one would have assumed to be completely independent; those belonging to the BNP, NLP and Third Way. Bennett is a strange and dodgy character and is, I would have thought, a very unlikely candidate for Special Branch to select as an informer. On the other hand, he seems to be trusted by Griffin, as witness his trip over to Northern Ireland where he was, we are told, negotiating a new rental deal for the Lie Lorry - the vehicle the membership of the BNP raised money to purchase, not rent.

Special Branch must be on overtime if the BNP is to be believed, for it claims that there has been a second recruitment attempt, this of one Kieran Dinsmore, the party's Northern Ireland organiser. Dinsmore, it seems, was followed home from work but was not offered a safe house, a false name, a fake moustache or a tiny spy camera the size of a molecule. That'll teach him not to watch James Bond films.

Just to drive the point that we are actually in the middle of a film set and that the BNP is in fiction a good deal more exciting than in real life, the party claims that a further two attempts have been made to recruit for Special Branch.
We can also report that we are already aware of two other BNP members — one of them not even a local official — who have been approached by Special Branch officers under the guise of making inquiries into people’s safety after the List leak, in an attempt to recruit them as informers.
We wondered what had caused this attack of fantasy mania - but the end of the article suddenly makes everything clear.
“In all probability there are other individuals out there right now who have been sucked in completely and are now wracked with guilt over letting down their friends and colleagues. Fortunately, there is no need for anyone to bear that burden...All anyone who has been groomed by the Special Branch into becoming an informer has to do to put it all behind them is to come and tell us...We’re not worried about what Smith’s Snoops have been told, or how long it’s been going on. We want to get their snouts out of our lawful business, and will not hold anything against anyone who comes clean. We’re not even going to shout about it, but we do need to be told.
Nick Griffin, no doubt encouraged by his South African spook-run 'Intelligence Team', is on his annual paranoia kick. Last year it was Searchlight moles and December rebel supporters; before that was the furore over the party's treatment of Sharon Ebanks and its obsession with kicking her and her supporters out, and this year it's Special Branch recruiting wholesale - all of which leads us to the final and most important part of the story.
Finally, for the large numbers of non-member readers who may not have come across this sort of thing before except in novels, please ask yourselves if you are happy living in a country where a politicised police force spies on opposition parties and arrests their activists, MPs and leaders. And, make up your mind to do something to help restore the democracy for which so many of our people have sacrificed so much...You could make up your mind to join the British National Party right now, or at least make a donation to help our fight back against Labour’s creeping tyranny. Persecuted BNP teacher Mark Walker needs £3,000 in legal fees URGENTLY to get his appeal finalised. Civil Liberty has already found £500 but it’s up to us to give him the rest...Mark has a young family to look after this Christmas, so it wouldn’t be fair to leave him to find that money. He’s at the frontline of our fight, at the frontline of the struggle to preserve your freedom. Please hit back by helping him now. Thank you.
Yes, that's what all the James Bond rubbish leads to - yet another piss-poor attempt to screw a load of money out of the BNP membership, by making use of the party's corporate persecution complex and using Mark Walker's case (and a mention of Christmas) as a final twist. Why does Walker need money? Isn't he represented freely by Solidarity? Isn't he taking legal advice freely from legal whiz Lee Barnes?

The truth is he doesn't need the money any more than any of us do - but what's the betting that the next payment for the Lie Lorry is around £2500-3000?

The BNP's stories and lies get more extravagant all the time but it's difficult to know how they'll get better than the rubbish they've used on this occasion. Perhaps next time, the story will involve Batman in some way. Or possibly Jack Bauer. The only thing we can be absolutely sure of is that it won't involve the truth.


eric the fish said...

yup, Simon was trumpeting this in advance on his wildlife blog. There was also mention earlier of a threatening letter - in green ink and containing white powder.

They must have ten year old copies of airport thrillers.

Next up a letter made up of characters cut out of newspapers and a typewritten threat which may be traced by Poirot as it was done on a golf ball typewriter.

The park bench scenario seems real too!

Psst. The Lizard men are here, mein Freund.
The frost is unusually crisp at Berchtesgaden.

Anonymous said...

I know Simon Bennett. Nice lad.

Anonymous said...

Griffin always uses people to make money. He's greedy fat scum.

Anonymous said...

This sounds exactly like something from the pen of the Mr Kemp - his next book is going to be a mystery novel - this is the practice run.

They are so childish that they cannt even remember what lies they have told from one month to the next, possibly they should employ a data manager (another job for a buddy) to keep track of the lies and provide the research for Mr Kemp's book of lies vloume three, or is it four?

grrrrr said...

"I know Simon Bennett. Nice lad."

I don't know him but I already think he's a cunt.

irishtony said...

Ya bunch of feckers... I just spluttered my coffee all over my laptop afetr reading this latest scam by the BNP.

Bloody hilarious and what makes it funnier is the 5 to 6 thousand members that they actually have will believe this utter crap.

Great article

Ex ex ex ex ex etc said...

The dog barks gently under the clocktower, comrade. Shit, I gave myself away...

"I know Simon Bennett. Nice lad."

No he isn't. he's a pompous prat who thinks he's cleverer than everyone he meets. He's a candidate for expulsion once Griffin realises that he could be a threat.

Kate 88 Dermented said...

I'll bark like a dog for a bone.

Anonymous said...

You would *so* dearly love to be taken seriously as a 'writer' wouldn't you, Ossowski ?

But the simple fact is, your 'writing' is shit - hysterical, childish ranting like some smug little twat working on a student 'newspaper' - which is what you are after all, I suppose...

Anonymous said...

"Perhaps next time, the story will involve Batman in some way. Or possibly Jack Bauer. The only thing we can be absolutely sure of is that it won't involve the truth."

Well said LU.

Antifascist said...

"But the simple fact is, your 'writing' is shit - hysterical, childish ranting like some smug little twat working on a student 'newspaper' - which is what you are after all, I suppose..."

Not a fan then?

Flakey said...

Part of the motivation for all this is to give the mebership the idea the moribound BNP is still a htreat and taken seriously even though its membership and votes are declining in general, albeit they will always have the odd surprsie win here and there. Its a tonic for the troops and cheap publicity. Its no coincidence that the phrase "you know when your over the target when you start taking flak" seems to be the most often quoted mantra from the BNP these days.

Perhaps if Gri$$in put as much effort into elections as into such flights of fancy the BNP would actually still be the threat it was just a few years ago

Dicky Barnbrook(Artist) said...

Hugh the impoversihed paedophile and I also do not like Ketlan's writing.

When we hold our Young BNP sessions at the Early Learning Centre, we always point to Ketlan's writings as the proof of the evil that men do.

I mean Ketlan, where is the love?

You constantly hark on about Nasty Nazis this, Nick Griffin that etc, etc.

Never once do you mention the Happy Sailor or the Horny Homo, two of my finer pieces of erotic boy-love literature.

As it's Christmas, I'm planning on leaving a copy of each in your stockings.

Please make sure you are wearing them when I pop around.

Anonymous said...

None of it has the ring of truth does it?
Maybe one of their 'singers' could record a cover version of Dept S's "Is Vic there?" with lyric altered to "Is Nick there?". Thats suitably sinister.

Or Magical Mystery Tour which sums up the Boudica 'Battle' Bus and the Truth Truck scenario

Anonymous said...

200 quid? Donht think the BNP have kept up with inflation, might have been a bit more believeable if it wasnt for that

Anonymous said...

They wouldn't !

Julia Pirie.

Anonymous said...

Not as far fetched as the shit you come out with. SBA

Anonymous said...

I am amazed that irishtony has got time to sit down for a coffee!!!!

But i agree with him the article was brilliant and all friends should have a copy put in their Christmas stocking. Ho Ho Ho


Blue Donkey said...

Bennett gets paid £1,700 a month from the Party (only second to Griffin as the highest earner), he also charges seperately for any additional work he is asked to carry out and claims a hell of a lot of expenses each month.

Anonymous said...

This could be more serious than you guys are giving it credit for.

Look at the story. Bennett is approached by SB and then gets the all-clear from the BNP leadership to play double agent.

Sounds more likely to me that Bennett has been informing for a long time and someone who is not much endeared to the BNP leadership may have found out. So he cooks up this story retrospectively to cover his arse when the inevitable fallout arrives, in cahoots with the Griffin.

Question is, what does that make Griffin?

Doctor Foster of Gloucester said...

"There was also mention earlier of a threatening letter - in green ink and containing white powder."

Isn't there a point at which fantasy takes over from reality? Which probably means Nick Griffin should be tucked away in a secure mental health facility as soon as possible, for the safety of both himself and the community.

Bimon Sennett (my secret Identity) said...

"The frost is unusually crisp at Berchtesgaden."

The domes of the Kremlin shine in the midday sum.

So Comrade Fishski. We meet again.

Anonymous said...

For fucks sake., this is the maddest thing ive heard from hq in ages, i don't know who nick thinks he's fooling but it isnt n the members

irishtony said...

"I am amazed that irishtony has got time to sit down for a coffee!!!!"

so am I Tulip so am I But now the baby is getting older and more relaxed hopefully there will be lots more cups of coffee, the odd glass of Jameson and numerous more chuckles at the idiots in the BNP.

Truth truck? Special Branch bribes?
Failure to secure a council seat in over 42 local elections over the last few months? membership lists published? 45 councillors out of a possible 22300? 42 parish councillors out of a possible 110,000 parish councillors?
Excalibur thrown out of their business premises? BNP Christmas parties cancelled? more begging letters? And last but not least the great LLB (Hons) himself, the UFO spotter and all round legal maestro never ceases to crease me up

2009 looks like a promising year.

Here's an idea for a humorous thread over Christmas

How about a competition? .What will happen with the BNP in 2009

Anonymous said...

You know at this rate Gri££in will be sending himself an Xmas card addresses in green ink and containing a white powder.

Whays the betting it will be postmarked fro East Anglia.

Old Sailor

Anonymous said...

Funny stuff. :-)

Anonymous said...

"he seems to have made a real dogs dinner of the BNP site"

He has. Too many gadgets or widgets or whatever you call them. Too much clutter.

Dave T said...

"So Comrade Fishski. We meet again."

LMAO That's bloody funny. And a bloody good article Ketlan.

Can Special Branch only afford £200? I think we should have a whip round to help them out.

Anonymous said...

£200? That's bollocks. They'd never be so tight with taxpayer's money.

Anonymous said...

Bennett fits right in with griffin. They're both fantasists.

Anonymous said...

"For fucks sake., this is the maddest thing ive heard from hq in ages, i don't know who nick thinks he's fooling but it isnt n the members"

Oh really! Contact me (it ain't hard), and I'll give you their mobile number. You can ask them yourself if it's true! Somehow, I doubt they'll admit to it though.

Anonymous said...

I know Simon Bennett and he really is a decent bloke. Oh, but I would say that, I am Simon Bennett.

: P

JT said...

"You can ask them yourself if it's true! Somehow, I doubt they'll admit to it though."

There's no fucking point in asking then is there, you moron.

Anonymous said...

Why would Special Branch need to pay anyone money to leak what goes on in the BNP they are pretty good at it themselves, leak membership, leak campaign strategy, leak who runs websites etc.

More leaks than a raincoat made of polo mints :)

Anonymous said...

The SB Meeeting log - Eyes Only










nark-o-lepsy said...

It's Gri££in who is the state nark.

xxxx said...

The SB Meeeting log - Eyes Only

Ha. Bloody funny. Good article too. LOL

Anonymous said...

It sound so like a plot for a movie, Special Branch trying to recruit informers, Irish connection hmm did BNP top brass go watch Fifty Dead Men Walking at the cinema the night before ?

Anonymous said...

Re: Woolies.......

Cyclops's BNP are thankfully slip-sliding down the drain like Woolworths.

Observer said...

I see all the Griffin people on Stormfront are pretending they believe this shite. No doubt the moronic BNP membershit (oops, excuse my spelling) will be taken in.

Cambridge Favourite said...

The laugh's on them, lol.

Lee Barnes must be flavour of the month amongst the loony conpiracy theorists wing of the British Nobody Party.

Griffinite lies live on said...

What a complete load of cockfaces, the whole lot of them. Reminds me of the time when in Halifax, one of the hardline former C18 BNP nazi candidates who lived in Boothtown (near the town centre) claimed on Look North that he had a visit from spooks who threatened to strangle him and his wife unless he cooperated with MI5.

jon said...

I think Gri££in and friends are concocting these lies to take the heat off their own state maneouvering, which involves a tasty EU kings ransom leaving the inept Peedo Boy at the helm of the bnp while the party bizzarely the buffers

Anonymous said...

BNP fail to take Ibstock & Heather.

With all that "wonderful" recent free publicity that they were crowing about then they really should have taken this seat.

No room for complacency on our part but they will be very disappointed with this result.

Anonymous said...

Shape of things to come:


BNP Activists in Extra Terrestrial shocker.

Family members of several BNP activists were today involved in frantic searches following the revelation that they were kidnapped by Extra Terrestrial visitors.

Several eyewitness accounts from Nantwich, Cheshire said that large blue lights appeared in the sky and several blinding flashes left them frozen as several hundred armed aliens descended from the spaceship, moments later the activists had vanished.

BNP leader Nick Griffin said he was shocked that Labour had resorted to interstellar intimidation tactics in a bid to stop the BNP achieving several seats in the upcoming Euro elections.

A police spokesman said "while a number of the people who reported this were under the influence of alcohol we would appeal for those who have family members missing to come forward to save us having to look through the list again".

Nick Griffin stated "We are appealing too, and ours was first, for £100,000,000,000 to design and build a interstellar cruiser and show that we won't be intimidated by left-wing groups, the Labour party or any foreigners who think they can wander around the galaxy in Death Stars"